Baila* had everything going for her: a wonderful home, beautiful children, and a great job. She and Yoni* had been married for six years when Baila started noticing her husband acting a little…different. He became more secretive with his comings and goings, was staying out late, dressing differently, and often talked on the phone in hushed tones. When Baila brought up the strange changes in his behavior and asked Yoni about what was going on, he dismissed her concerns as “paranoid” and “naive” and told her to “mind her own business.”
The problem was, Yoni was her husband; and this was her business, whether he was ready to share with her or not. After some digging, Baila finally found out what Yoni had fallen into: he had a serious gambling addiction.
Feeling lost and like she had nowhere to turn, Baila googled Jewish organizations that could possibly provide assistance, and came across Amudim. She finally mustered up the courage to call, and was directed to a clinical case manager. They had several phone conversations, and Baila began feeling some hope after receiving guidance and finding a caring and non-judgemental space to voice her concerns. She confronted Yoni and was stonewalled, even when she told him that she had found out about his addiction and about the people at Amudim who could help him. After listening to her frustration, our case manager helped Baila understand that addiction is a disease, and there is no way to help someone until he realizes his problem and wants to be helped. Meanwhile, the case manager set Baila up with a therapist, where she could process her feelings and receive guidance on how to interact with her husband’s addiction.
Baila is still waiting for the day that Yoni will realize that he needs help; but in the meantime, she is not alone. Baila now has a support system to back her during this difficult time, and a case manager at Amudim who cares and is waiting to rejoice with Baila when her husband is ready to pick up the phone and take the first step in facing his addiction. And she can continue to fight another day for herself and her family. If you or someone you know is struggling with addiction, we are here to help. Call us anytime (646) 251-8077.
*Details changed for privacy purposes