Understanding addiction, awareness, and practical balance in the digital age
Technology surrounds every part of our lives — at home, in yeshiva, at work, even in how we relax. The challenge isn’t that technology exists; it’s that it magnifies whatever we put into it. Used right, it multiplies Torah, chesed, and connection. Used carelessly, it multiplies distraction, comparison, and harm.
This guide explores how technology impacts our brains and relationships, why digital addiction happens, and how to create realistic habits that restore balance and purpose.
Technology simply means innovation — anything that helps people do something faster, easier, or at scale.
From the wheel and the printing press to the smartphone, technology has always magnified human potential.
It’s not good or bad; it’s neutral power. A gun magnifies harm. The printing press magnified Torah. The internet does both.
When someone spreads lashon hara online, it can reach thousands. When someone spreads Torah or kindness online, that same reach becomes a tremendous tool for good. The goal isn’t rejection — it’s awareness.
Healthy behavior brings positive results and teaches us to repeat it. Addiction happens when we continue doing something even when the results are harmful — when the activity starts to serve as an escape from reality instead of genuine enjoyment.
The brain’s reward system relies on dopamine, a natural chemical Hashem built into us to motivate positive behavior. But social media, gaming, and gambling apps are designed to hack that system.
Every sound, notification, or “like” is programmed to trigger small dopamine bursts — enough to keep us hooked. The more time we spend on these platforms, the less sensitive the brain becomes, pushing us to scroll longer for smaller payoffs.
These are the same principles casinos use to keep gamblers playing. The digital world just brings the casino into our pocket.
During World War II, many Allied soldiers hesitated to fire at the enemy — it went against their humanity. By the Korean War, hesitation had nearly disappeared.
What changed? The arrival of television.
Even basic, black-and-white portrayals of violence desensitized viewers to human suffering. The same happens today when people are repeatedly exposed to violence, explicit material, or humiliation online. The first time it shocks. The tenth time it doesn’t.
Our eyes and ears are gateways to the brain, just as our veins are gateways to the bloodstream. What we consume visually or audibly changes brain chemistry — no less than any substance.
Texting and DM’s have replaced real conversations — and with them, the tone, body language, and facial cues that make communication human.
Avi Landa shared a clip showing how a single misunderstood message can spiral into full-blown conflict.
When words lose tone, intent gets lost. Relationships — friendships, dating, marriage — are healthier when serious topics happen in person or by voice, not through a screen.
If it’s important, talk. Texts are for logistics, not for connection.
1. AI Fakery and Deepfakes
A face can now be placed on any image or video. Even if labeled as “AI,” the embarrassment spreads faster than the truth. “Disappearing” apps don’t protect you — screenshots and photos of screens last forever.
2. Fear of Missing Out (FOMO)
Many teens stay up half the night just in case they miss the next post in a group chat. The cost? Lost sleep, anxiety, and dependency on meaningless cycles of entertainment.
3. Identity Scams and Spoofing
Technology allows anyone to imitate someone else’s phone number or email. Scammers use fake identities, even pretending to be family. If something feels urgent or emotional, always verify through another channel before reacting.
4. Permanent Digital Footprints
Posts from years ago have cost people jobs, shidduchim, and reputations. Online behavior is never private — assume everything can be seen again one day.
Human beings are wired to solve puzzles. That curiosity — the satisfaction of figuring something out — is the same neurological pathway that makes apps, games, and social feeds addictive.
The randomness of “what comes next” keeps us locked in the loop: “one more scroll,” “one more round,” “one more check.”
What was designed as curiosity becomes compulsion.
Modern research (including work by Dr. Andrew Huberman) helps explain why endless scrolling feels exhausting:
This is why “I’ll just check one more thing” often turns into an hour lost — the brain’s attention system has been hijacked.
1. Be Honest With Yourself
Ask the simple questions:
– Am I happy with the content I consume?
– Is this time helping or hurting me?
If the answer is “unhappy” or “I don’t know,” it’s time to change something.
2. Set Real Boundaries, Not Just Intentions
Time limits and screen restrictions might sound basic, but even the 10-second pause before overriding a limit gives your brain a chance to make a conscious choice.
3. Add Filters and Accountability Tools
Professional filters or parental locks aren’t about control — they’re about friction. The harder it is to slip, the less often you will.
4. Designate “No-Phone Zones”
Keep devices out of the bathroom and out of reach during bedtime. Most people gain 30–40 extra minutes daily just from those two rules.
5. Ask for Guidance or Support
If you struggle to limit screen time or find yourself pulled toward inappropriate or risky behavior, talk to someone — a friend, parent, rebbi, or counselor. Speaking about it out loud raises self-awareness and builds strength.
This isn’t about guilt — it’s about power.
Understanding how technology manipulates attention gives you back control.
You can use the same tools that once distracted you to connect, create, and do good.
The same phone that magnifies addiction can magnify healing.
Amudim provides education, support, and referral services for individuals and families struggling with technology overuse, addiction, or mental-health challenges.
If you or someone you care about needs guidance, reach out.